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Matt Gaetz Is ‘Almost Too Florida,’ Says Stephen Colbert

Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. We’re all stuck at home at the moment, so here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.

The late-night hosts had plenty to say on Thursday about the accusations against Representative Matt Gaetz, Republican of Florida, as investigators examine a trip he took to the Bahamas with Jason Pirozzolo, a marijuana entrepreneur and hand surgeon.

“Yes, marijuana entrepreneur and hand surgeon, which means he can cure your carpal tunnel and turn your thumb into a bong,” Stephen Colbert joked on Thursday’s “Late Show.”

“Of course, Pence is currently considering a lot of titles for his memoir. First there’s ‘Fifty Shades of White.’ There’s also ‘Lord of the Flies.’ Next there’s ‘Tuesdays with Moron.’ And finally, ‘Are you There, Mother? It’s Me, Your Husband.” — JIMMY FALLON

“Pence’s publisher calls this ‘the definitive book on one of the most consequential presidencies in American history.’ Oh, it was consequential, all right.” — JIMMY KIMMEL

“The book will cover not just Pence’s time in the White House but his whole life, including traumatic family events like the time he saw Mother without her bonnet. He even opens up about the time in college he experimented with almond milk.” — JIMMY KIMMEL

“I’m sure there will be a lot of talk about religion, his hopes and dreams, and then maybe a chapter about how his boss tried to murder him.” — JIMMY FALLON

Glenn Close talked about spending her pandemic in Montana on Thursday night’s “Desus & Mero.”

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